Зарубежный юмор - скачать книги или читать онлайн. Страница 1

Селеста Барбер – актриса и комик из Австралии. Несколько лет назад она начала публиковать в своем инстаграм-аккаунте пародии на инста-див и фешен-съемки, где девушки с идеальными телами сидят в претенциозных позах, артистично изгибаются или непринужденно пьют утренний смузи в одном белье. Нужно сказать, что Селеста родила двоих детей и размер ее одежды совсем не S. За восемнадцать месяцев количество ее подписчиков выросло до 3 миллионов. Она стала живым воплощением той женской части инстаграма, что наблюдает за глянцевыми картинками со смесью скепсиса, зависти и восхищения, – то есть большинства женщин, у которых слишком много забот, чтобы с непринужденным видом жевать лист органического салата или медитировать на морском побережье с укладкой и макияжем. В своей дебютной книге Селеста с юмором рассказывает о том, как не бояться быть собой, любить свое тело, а главное, как найти #сексимужа, даже если у тебя нет подбородка и есть лишние килограммы…

The Personals reveals how classified ads are not just a few commercial lines of text in print or online – they can be a treasure trove of fascinating human stories; stories of love, loss, loneliness, redemption and hope. Some people do Sudoku, others watch Netflix. Brian O’Connell loves the classified ads. In an era of spin doctors and press releases, celebrities and social influencers, the classified ads can open a door into the lives of ordinary people with extraordinary stories. What draws Brian to the classified ads are the intriguing human stories he finds there, the unexpected twists and turns, the personalities, the curious objects and the range of human experience waiting to be discovered. The Personals is a diverse collection of compelling stories about the people and the lives behind the small ads.

’Massively enjoyable’ Dawn French I Carried a Watermelon is a love story to Dirty Dancing. A warm, witty and accessible look at how Katy Brand’s life-long obsession with the film has influenced her own attitudes to sex, love, romance, rights and responsibilities. It explores the legacy of the film, from pushing women’s stories to the forefront of commercial cinema, to its ‘Gold Standard’ depiction of abortion according to leading pro-choice campaigners, and its fresh and powerful take on the classic ‘coming of age’ story told from a naïve but idealistic 17-year-old girl’s point of view. Part memoir based on a personal obsession, part homage to a monster hit and a work of genius, Katy will explore her own memories and experiences, and talk to other fans of the film, to examine its legacy as a piece of filmmaking with a social agenda that many miss on first viewing. One of the most celebrated and viewed films ever made is about to have the time of its life.

The Sunday Times bestseller returns for a sixth book! Alfie and his mischievous kitten George are back for more adventures – this time with a puppy in tow… At Christmas time we all need a friend… Alfie and his kitten, George, have always known that a human is for life and not just for Christmas. So when George learns that one of the residents of Edgar Road has been taken into hospital, he realises it’s up to him to provide some comfort at this difficult time of year. The only problem is that they now have a little puppy in tow – Pickles the Pug, who is convinced he can be a cat if only he sticks with his new found friends. As George tries to do everything he can to make the world – and its humans – happier, Alfie struggles to keep Pickles in check and out of trouble. Because even the best laid plans can be destroyed by a well-meaning – but mischievous – little puppy… Join Alfie, George – and now Pickles – as they come to the rescue of some lonely souls. The perfect read for fans of James Bowen from the Sunday Times bestseller.

A hilarious story of the ups and downs of unexpected single motherhood, the perfect laugh-out-loud romance for fans of Why Mummy Drinks, The Unmumsy Mum and The Not So Perfect Mum. With a devilish toddler and baby number two on the way, Rachel’s big dream is to one day go to the toilet on her own. So, she’s surprised to discover that her husband has found the time to have an exciting affair while she’s been bringing up their family. Suddenly, Rachel is left wrangling with a child who will only eat crackers and a 35-week bump. She knows even Mumsnet isn’t going to solve this. What Rachel needs is a handsome, good-with-children, single man. But she can barely leave the house without a stain on her top and child on her hip. How on earth can she claim her life back, let alone thinking about dating? What others are saying about Mummy Needs a Break: ‘Oh my goodness! This book is extremely gripping with lots of twists and things I did not see coming… The mummy parts are totally relatable and there are lots of funny moments mixed with sad, emotional ones too. A great easy-to-read book. I really enjoyed it. ’ Reader reviewer, 5 stars ‘This book was excellent!’ Reader review, 5 stars ‘A fabulous read!’ Reader review, 5 stars ‘Read this in one sitting can’t wait for the next book. ’ Reader review, 5 stars ‘This one is for all the women out there busting butt and getting it done! Love this book. Read the whole thing in one day. You will laugh, relate and just love this book. ’ Reader review, 5 stars ‘Had me giggling out loud… If you are looking for a fun, feel good, uplifting read, with a strong female lead, plenty of humour, drama and a dash of romance, then you will love Mummy Needs A Break!’ Reader review, 4 stars ‘This book had me laughing, shouting and also melted my heart’ Reader review, 4 stars ‘Perfect chick lit! I recommend this for anyone looking for a light and fun read!’ Reader review, 4 stars ‘Absolutely fantastic had me gripped!!! Loved it! Can't wait for more from this author. ’ Reader review, 4 stars

The bestselling author of Love Byte is back with this laugh-out-loud hilarious rom com! Getting hit by a bus was the best thing that ever happened to him… When one wrong step – and the poor timing of the number 19 bus – send Nathan Jones to the Edinburgh morgue his story should have ended…but then he went and woke up. Returned to real life Nathan finds a wife disappointed that he’s miraculously returned from the dead and an unshakeable attraction for mortuary technician Kat – the woman who brought him back to life, in more ways than one. Now, as his world implodes and Kat leads him down an unexpected path, Nathan somehow finds himself having the time of his second life… A hilarious, uplifting story of second chances, death defying hijinks and motorhome mayhem – Mhairi McFarlane meets Eleanor Oliphant!

488 Rules for Life is Kitty Flanagan's way of making the world a more pleasant place to live. Providing you with the antidote to every annoying little thing, these rules are not made to be broken. 488 Rules for Life is not a self-help book, because it's not you who needs help, it's other people. Whether they're walking and texting, asphyxiating you on public transport with their noxious perfume cloud, or leaving one useless square of toilet paper on the roll, a lot of people just don't know the rules. But thanks to Kitty Flanagan's comprehensive guide to modern behaviour, our world will soon be a much better place. A place where people don't ruin the fruit salad by putting banana in it … where your co-workers respect your olfactory system and don't reheat their fish curry in the office microwave … where middle aged men don't have ponytails … Other rules to live by include: 1. Men must wear shorts over leggingsThe gym is no place for people to discover whether or not you are circumcised. That’s a private discussion for another place and time. 2. Team bonding activities should be optionalSome people love it when management decides that an afternoon of bowling or paintballing or (god forbid) karaoke will help everyone work better as a team. Others would rather be dead. 3. Don’t ever mention your ‘happy place’To me, this sounds less like a pleasant, fun state of mind and more like some kind of utopian wank palace you’ve had built in the basement. What started as a personal joke is now a quintessential reference book with the power to change society. (Or, at least, make it a bit less irritating. ) What people are (Kitty Flanagan is) saying about this book: 'You're welcome everyone. ' 'Thank god for me. ' 'I'd rather be sad and lonely, but right. ' 'There's not actually 488 rules in here but it sure feels like it'.

‘Refreshing and fun’ Debbie Johnson ‘Thoroughly entertaining’ Love Reading Dating is hard. Being dateless at your perfect sister's wedding is harder. Meet Kelly. A brilliant but socially awkward robotics engineer desperately seeking a wedding date… Meet Ethan. Intelligent, gorgeous, brings out the confidence Kelly didn’t know she had and … not technically human. (But no one needs to know that. ) With her sister’s wedding looming and everyone in the world on her case about being perpetually single, Kelly decides to take her love life into her own hands – and use her genius skills to create Ethan. But when she can’t resist keeping her new boy toy around even after the ‘I do’s’, Kelly knows she needs to hit the off switch on this romance, fast. Only, when you’ve found (well, made) your perfect man, how do you kiss him goodbye? Readers love this book! ‘Funny, lighthearted, joyous, romantic and fun…really awesome’ Karen W, Netgalley ‘Reminded me a lot of Jane Austen's dry humour…super relaxing summer read’ Sophie G, Netgalley ‘Charming…An ideal read for a summer day’ Petra Q, Netgalley

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«Художник Кляксель» – книга, полная тонкого юмора и ироничных иллюстраций, положивших начало жанру комикса. Это стихотворная история о художнике Куно Клякселе, которая охватывает всю его жизнь и повествует о случившихся с ним веселых историях.

I don’t need the perfect guy.I don’t need candlelight or roses.Honestly, I don’t even need a real bed…Ellie Kolstakis is a twenty-one-year-old virgin.She’s not religious. She’s not waiting for marriage. She’s not even holding on for The One.Ellie’s just unlucky.But with her final year of university coming to an end, she’s determined to shed her V-plates, once and for all.And she’s ready to try anything – from submitting to her domineering Greek mother’s matchmaking skills to embracing the world of nether-waxing trends (no-one wants a ‘Hitler’) and even YouTube tutorials on how to give a ‘blow gift’ (it should never be a job).After all, what has she got to lose? Well, besides the obvious.Praise for VIRGIN'Laugh out loud…Bridget Jones could take a page from this novel' – Joan Rivers‘An entertaining romp’– Emma Barnett, broadcaster and women's editor of The Telegraph’Bridget Jones and Carrie Bradshaw, meet your wisecracking, vagina obsessed match. Sanghani's debut is a hilarious, irreverent look at smart-alecky, painfully self-conscious, 21-year-old Ellie's relentless mission to rectify a disastrous first attempt at performing oral sex, get deflowered, find the perfect Brazilian wax, avoid her tradition-bound Greek mother's nagging, graduate summa cum laude, be a writer, and fit in…This story for millennials is a wonderful blend of modern agnst with old-fashioned sweetness.” -Publisher's Weekly